Flasher in the Park

[Stephanie Ray]

It was one of those old parks, large and sprawling with massive trees shading aging benches covered in too many layers of paint. The type with historical markers that made you ponder days gone by.

The kids and I were taking a break from the fun and heat, eating snacks under one of several pavilions. Southern laziness hovered in the air as I heard my 5 year-old son’s voice shout urgently, “Mommy, I have to go poop!”

Great timing, I thought, as I said out loud, “Okay, honey, let me get our snack picked up and we’ll walk over to the restroom.” I looked up. My son’s shorts and underwear were down, 5 inches south of where they should be, leaving nothing to the imagination. “What are you doing?!” I shrieked. His surprised look confused me, as did his response. “I’m going to poop,” he said, matter-of-factly.

“Not here, you’re not!” I countered, yanking his pants up quickly, roughly. “We have to walk to the restroom. It’s over there.” I pointed to a building that must have seemed miles away in his young eyes. He starting crying and pulling downward at his shorts. “No!” I said sternly. He stopped working at his shorts and began to jump up and down as I quickly collected our things and took hold of his sister’s 2 year-old hand. “Let’s go!” I said. “We’ll hurry!”

So, off we went, as hastily as little legs would enable us, to the restroom on the other side of the world.

Later, as we continued our morning at the park, returning somewhat to a peaceful state under the green canopy, I tried to figure out how my son could possibly think it was okay to drop his pants in public. I would have expected this behavior from the sibling being toilet-trained, but not from her elder brother.

“Sean, why did you pull your pants down in front of everyone?”
He didn’t hesitate. “I needed to poop on the tree.”

Okay, that explains everything, I thought, still confused. I asked him why.

“There wasn’t a restroom,” he said.

Our conversation took on a circular pattern, with me pointing out that, while distant, there was an available restroom, and regardless, we never poop on trees. He was equally confident in his assertion that it was a perfectly normal, natural thing to do if the restroom wasn’t conveniently located.

Then, suddenly, the light came on in my head. In the past, Sean had told me about two separate occasions where he was with a friend and his dad. Both times they were at a park with no restroom and Sean needed to relieve himself. Being in a jam, both dads told him to use a tree.

Ahh, I thought. “Did you think you could use the bathroom on the tree because that’s what you’ve done before?”

“Yes,” he said. His tone and expression added, Duh.

You know, a little knowledge is a dangerous thing.

It got me to thinking, sitting on one of those benches under the great oaks, “Is that what I do sometimes? Do I experience a small microcosm of life and assume that those experiences equal truth? Do I judge people when they don’t fit the box I’m living in and embarrass myself and others with my limited knowledge? Am I open to the Father’s instruction, or do I go around in circles with him, thinking that if I say just the right thing, the light will click on and he’ll see it from my point of view? Ouch.

“Then the Lord answered Job out of the storm, “Who is this that darkens my counsel with words without knowledge? . . . Where were you when I laid the earth’s foundation? Tell me, if you understand.” Job 38:1-2, 4

Just as I’ll never forget the flashing incident at the park, I hope I never forget the extent of the Lord’s protection over me when I trust in him and not myself. May I always remember to “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight.” Proverbs 3:5-6

Much better than the alternative. No one wants to get caught with their pants down.